People are going to listen and believe what they want to believe. Not everyone cares about the TRUTH. Don't waste your life running around trying to 'correct' the mistakes in the story line.
Let it be.
If people would listen to what someone says about someone else, that person really isn't worth you wanting to know.
Real people worth knowing, will come to know YOU from being around YOU. Real people don't take other peoples word for things. They look for what's REAL and the people that are REAL.
Something to think about while someone is bashing someone else to you..... Just remember this is how they bash YOU to SOMEONE ELSE, too.
I know we've talked about this before and I'm sure I've mentioned a few times, my life has been hell in that sense. When I got pregnant at 14 and was shotgun wedded into marrying the father at 15, I can say it wasn't about LOVE. And it wasn't a normal family I was getting myself into.
In 11 long years I learned so much about His mother who was a bully and pushed people into getting her way. She walked over people and taught her children how to 'cheat the system' in every direction. Gossip and lies tearing each other down all the time. Drinking, violence and total disrespect of the laws.
Total opposite of how I was raised to have honor, integrity and respect.
He was competing for his parents attention as his older brother was bringing them their first grandchildren. At the same time {Unrealized at the time, he was struggling with an addiction to alcohol as a teenager, that was being ignored by his parents}.
My parents were about to move back to Canada away from the US, and I had already been to 17 schools in 2 countries, the few short years attended. I was set to graduate at 16 and all their moving was screwing up my chances at a good life.
I was living with his brother & wife & baby, trying to finish school. Yes, I was in a relationship with him. For me 'the teenage thing to do, nothing serious'. His sister in law and he discussed the possible times during a month, that a girl could get pregnant, watched the calendar and set me up for a 'date night'!
This wasn't the story of a GIRL TRAPPING A BOY, THIS WAS A BOY TRAPPING A GIRL. Because my family was leaving the country his mother insisted I stay here with the baby. Made so many promises out her ass and blew everyone of them.
After 11 years of hell, I divorced with 4 small children in tow...... Alone not much family in the state, not much for resources back then...
His most repeated words then were YOUR DEAD, IF I CAN'T HAVE YOU , NOBODY WILL. TILL DEATH DO WE PART. His actions were true to his words.
Courts were different back then and 'protection orders' were not easy to get. I had to go in with strangulation marks on my neck and 2 officer statements of how out of control he was and how ransacked my house was when they arrived. He was in the process of strangling me with a telephone cord {Something else you don't see these days} when his brother came in and turned to run get me help. His brothers testimony to the police was in the report. An additional report of how it took 6 officers to take him down, later proved to be my salvation.
What his family has done to me and how they have treated me and my children since has been stunning...
I've been accused of having abortions, when in fact I had miscarriages that doctors had to abort. One after taking my husbands knee to the gut.
I've been accused of abusing my kids, when in fact I am one of the last parents standing that believed in RAISING AND TRAINING using discipline with their children. NOT letting them get FAT on candy. Strangely enough, I rarely had to 'spank' or 'discipline' my kids. The one child of mine that insists I abused him, was violently beaten by his father on multiple occasions.
{I tried to save my son, but things were different back then, we didn't have instant phones that could take pictures or record what was being said, very hard to prove cases in court especially when the child was afraid to testify} .
I've been accused of cheating on my husband, when in fact I have friends that took me out when I was separated and trying to leave my husband, helping me find away out of the toxic abuse I was in. It was never sex, or cheating. Not even when the love of my life came back around. My whole mission with him was to help him see... and it worked. His life is good now.
I grew up with 3 older brothers and had a sister that married early - left home then passed away by the time I was 18. I was always close to my brothers, so it was only natural that all my BEST FRIENDS were guys!
People will choose to believe what they want to believe and more often than not, the story spins out into more than the original teller ever told.
Here is one of my favorite stories to share as a prime example.
The most well known and popular story of my childhood was THE DAY I CAUGHT THE HOUSE ON FIRE. I was 6 yrs old. Left home alone with my 9 mth old baby niece in a crib in the next room. My mom and sister left walking to the store.
Me.... I love fire, liked matches burning. Sulfur smelled good to me. So I was lighting matches, blowing them out, then throwing them out the kitchen window. {second level}. Un beknown to me, my dad had poured gasoline on a bee hive down in that corner of the house. One of my matches didn't go out and POOF, before you knew it, I had flames in front of me 2 stories high! Fortunately my mom and sister were on their way back, seen the fire and grabbed the garden hose to quickly douse the flames. Nothing but a scorch mark all the way up the house and a little pealed paint. One terrified mother and sister and needless to say, I was never left unattended again, for a few years. lol ,
Now years later, I'm accused of threatening to burn houses down, attempting to burn houses down and probably more stories I haven't even heard yet.
Don't waste your energy chasing rumors! You'll never catch up!