I highly recommend starting the day with prayer! I have come to rediscover that asking God first - "What shall I do?" Tends to lead my decisions in a better direction. I have always asked God "What do I do?" but more often than not, it's while in the midst of a situation.
Being in a reactive position rather than a proactive position.
If any of this sounds familiar, that's probably the title of a past blog ~ Reactive vs Proactive.
How we make decisions on the choices before us, often depends on if we are being 'reactive' or 'proactive'.
Reactive ~ Some people are reactive to everything, from simple comments to big catastrophic events. For others, it tends to be the more common response when things are urgent, or accidental. Life is less planned and more responsive. Often caught 'off guard' in many situations, with less of a plan, scrambling to overcome the obstacles. Reactive people tend to wait for things to happen before trying to do 'something about it'. Often resulting in negative circumstances.
Proactive ~ Folks appear slower to respond to simple comments as well as catastrophic events. They think about it and analyze before responding. Even in the urgency of an accident, they are usually calmer and more coordinated. Life is more planned out with an A, B or C plan. Not to be caught 'off guard' as often and manage to overcome the circumstances. Proactive people tend to plan for things that could happen, doing things to prevent 'something negative happening'. Allowing a positive result from a negative circumstance, more often than not.
Some things are unpreventable -
accidents, natural occurrences, injuries and even death.
Everyone responds differently. The most proactive people can become the most reactive, while the most reactive people can take on a proactive approach in the matter.
There is more often than not a multiple-choice answer to every circumstance, and every situation. Every decision we make - could go one way or the other for a good outcome or bad.
We are faced with choices and forced to make decisions every day. Some light - others heavy. Some small and trivial while others are big and life changing. No matter how hard we try to keep them to ourselves. Whether we can see it or not, our decisions affect those around us. Sometimes affecting people, we don't even know or have never seen.
A simple example ~ A donation to a charity, is a choice and decision that affects someone you don't even know. Choosing not to donate, has an alternate effect, whether you can see it or not.
Deciding factors ~ weighing in the key elements and variables of a decision:
Example ~ Should I sell my house and move? A series of questions and answers. How is the housing market? How long will it take to sell? Will I get enough to buy again? Am I moving away from family or closer to family? What's wrong with here and better about there? Why do I want to sell my house? Who all will it affect?
Should I sell or stay here? Big choice - The decision is complicated.
Personally, my life has had multiple circumstances and situations where I had no say or choice in decisions and was left with nothing but a 'reactive' response. As a child for example, you have little say in the choices your parents make and find yourself trying to adapt to the decisions they have made. Sometimes reactive other times proactive. You still are faced with a choice in your decision on how you are going to deal with the circumstances.
I believe the things that happen to us during childhood, often mold the direction our behavior is going to take. Either as a proactive or reactive choice in matters. Either way ~ you are constantly faced with choices and the decisions you make will map out the path of your future in life.
When I chose to get a divorce, it was a proactive response to a negative situation. After living 11 years being reactive to circumstances, I had no control over. Again, I find myself in a negative situation that I live 'reactively' while I'm trying to get away from it, taking proactive approach.
Sometimes other people's choices and decisions affect your own choices and decisions. A man chooses to mistreat his wife, she wants to leave, and people will often input and affect her thinking - "oh he's not so bad, I feel sorry for him." Not taking your personal pain into consideration. OR "why are you still with him? he's a horrible person" Not understanding it's not so easy to just pack up and leave.
There is nothing worse than being accused of 'sabotaging' yourself to stay with someone you are desperately trying to get away from. Often situations are not only your choice, and the decision is affected by what others do.
I have found myself with 3 choices coming up the end of May. I desperately want to move alone. One choice would help me and someone else, however if I'm not alone, I'm afraid of the damage it will do to someone else's life. The original choice I can't afford unless I have a partner. I know either way, my life complicated. The 3rd choice is to move back into the truck.?
Sounds cold I know.
But I can't keep living with someone that has no respect for me.
Not all choices are easy, and decisions always affect others as well as yourself.
Which is why, I highly suggest starting each day - with God - Asking "What shall we do today?" Instead of waiting until we have to ask, "What now?"
Blessed by God
Life can be complicated @ the Bright Side of the Barn.
Thanks for stopping by
Until next time, Stay Safe and Happy Trails.
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