Down a different path

 

If you have ever had a major traumatic event occur in your life, you understand, sometimes, it takes a while to recover. I had a few things happen in the same time span and it wasn't easy to get through, So it took longer.

The last few posts have been down a different path, simply because I'm coming up on 2 years of being 'on the road to recovering'. No, I'm not an alcoholic or drug addict. I've had a lot of stress in my life and I have finally gotten to a place that's stress free.... Or at least much less stress. This in turn has improved my heart.... which has increased my expected life span. 2 years without an attack. Or collapse. So, yes this feels good.

I started down a different path a couple years ago. That path has brought me to the Bright side of the Barn and a happy place. For anyone that knows anything about depression or anxiety, they would understand the victory in 'finding a happy place'.

Mental illnesses affect a lot of people. A lot more people than people want to admit about themselves.

Depression has been around for a long time, while things like anxiety and bipolar as well as PTSD, are new to the everyday ear.

We don't understand and it freaks us out.

I have someone in my life, that refused to admit they had a problem. Blamed, hurt and destroyed everyone around them. It took years, they almost killed them self and It was ugly. Finally, and I don't know what finally broke through, but finally, they admitted they had a problem. Instead of tearing everyone else apart, they finally got help, and medication and therapy. So now, they lead a fairly normal life.

Not everyone is so lucky. Not everyone has someone willing to go through the hell, to help them. Sometimes we have so much of our own hell to get through, we don't have anything left to help someone else.
And some people, just don't understand so they turn a blind eye and hope to God it never happens to them.

Mental health is much like our physical health. If we don't do the things to keep it healthy, it gets sick.

A sick mind is a dangerous place to be. 

We all take pity and compassion for those suffering from cancer. But we don't see the suffering of those with emotional illnesses and have no compassion. In fact, many mentally ill people get kicked to the curb and that is a great part of our homeless population.

Something to think about anyway.

We'll be getting back to the fun stuff, I'm about done with reminiscing ... Would be nice if the rain would stop so we could do more fun stuff outside. Cabin fever is starting to set in ..

Blessed by God

Life's good @ the Bright side of the Barn.

Thanks for stopping by,

Until next time, Stay safe and Happy Trails.

This feels good.

This really feels good. When I look back to then; and see now.... 

I feel more like me now than I have ever. The stress has subsided and the noise in my head has finally quieted down. 

All I ever wanted was a peaceful place for my kids to grow up. And for them to have a solid start on life. Unfortunately we don't leave our children with the foundations we used to. "Saving for college", is for the wealthy, "Inheritance" doesn't exist. Life insurance is taxed to death! So they don't get much there.

I wanted my Grama house and to have my family over on Sunday's and holidays for dinner. I love to cook. My grand kids anytime they wanted to be there. But that didn't happen. 

I didn't get much help in that and felt I've been on this road alone for a long time.

I left their dad because of his drinking and violence. I disagreed with the way his family raised children. He himself failed kindergarten because his mother allowed him to stay home and drink with his dad at the age of 6. She wasn't much better at being a mother in law, than she was as a mother. 

My second time around wasn't much better, his family was prejudice. And I never should have subjected my kids to that and all that came with it. His mother was much like my own and too drunk to remember anything, again another raised to drink and the adults think it's cute? 

It wasn't that I didn't like anyone. I DON'T LIKE DRUNKS. I didn't agree with the way they behaved. I wanted better examples of adults for my children to grow up around. 

It's not easy always having to defend yourself and the truth. It's not easy doing the right thing, when your feelings want to do something else. But somebody has to be mature about things.

I've walked on egg shells most of the time. In my first marriage I was constantly being criticized and put down for my parenting. In my second marriage, I was disliked because I had my own children and didn't put his child first.

I've been accused and blamed for so much I have never, nor would I do. It's nice not having anyone live with me. I have my privacy. I don't have people speculating that I'm plotting against them.... I don't have to listen to their drama, nor be stuck in the middle of it. I don't have to tiptoe because someone else is upset and I don't want to be the blowup.

I found my "tribe" and I'm happy with them. My horse is the greatest! The goats too funny for their own good. The chickens have become more than just chickens and egg layers. They are pets. My cats and dog, have always been there for me. And none of them, ever think I'm out to get them, nor are they plotting against me LOL..

I don't do social media so I don't have to see the stupidness of people, nor listen to the drama. I keep life real with respect, and it feels good living in the moment. Not having to live for anyone else of their expectations.

Be your best.

Blessed by God

Life's good at the Bright side of the Barn

Thanks for stopping by

Until next time, Stay safe and Happy Trails.